Not My Child! Monday

Welcome to Not My Child! Monday! This is my first stab at the blog carnival that was created by MckMama and is used to confess all of the things that your child did not do! You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else have not been doing this week.

As for what my child has not been doing...

My 4 1/2 year old absolutely did not wear this get-up outside, none-the-less run up to the top of the driveway and enthusiastically wave at passers by while eating an ice cream cone!

Nope, my child would never wear just a pull-up, boots and a red yarn necklace with a candy corn charm on it. Not my child!

And I certainly do not want to know what our neighbors think of us!

My son also does not have any strange bathroom behavior. You would never catch him making a sling out of toilet paper to hold his pee-pee up while going to the bathroom and then using another piece of toilet paper (clean, of course!) to flush the toilet so that he would not have to was his hands! Nope, not my child!

Oh, and you would never hear him yell, "Fire in the hole!" while urinating either! Not my child!

And finally, not to gross you out, but my son also would not ever go up to his dad (who ironically hates any talk about bm's) and say, "Dad, did you know that I pooped real corn!" Nope, not my child!